I’m not sure if I’ll ever fully understand this relationship that we have. A part of me wants to hate you with all that I have in me, yet a larger part loves you more than life itself. You were the first person I truly fell in love with. I loved the good and the bad that makes you. You are my best friend. Even though I try not talking to you, you’re the one I want to turn to when I am unsure of what’s going on in my life.

I hate her for not loving you. I hate her for stringing you along. It’s funny though. Your eagerness to win her affection is similar to the eagerness I had for you. I wonder how different our lives may have been if I had made you chase me more. Would we still be together? Or would have it not lasted once we had established something?

Even with miles between us, I still feel the fire in our first kiss. I still get butterflies when you laugh on the phone. My heart still skips a beat. And we still get each other to a degree with is pretty much terrifying. I wonder what life will be like in two weeks when I see your face again. I’m nervous to find out.